Author Archives: jon

A Moving Experience

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This weekend has been absolutely full-on, with our moving flats in just two days. I have been packing, packing and packing, looking after my daughters, and looking after Jo.

Jo had a bicycle accident this week, and broke her foot. Luckily, she had already done a bit of putting stuff away in boxes, but there was a lot left to do, and she was pretty much unable to help, much to her dismay and frustration. So the ball was passed to me, and it is thanks to our friends Mark and Alex that I sit here this evening with a reasonably easy two days ahead of me. They may not think they did much, but just going out to get more moving boxes saved me valuable time.

They say that moving is one of the most stressful things to do. I cannot entirely agree, but this weekend has shown me how capable I can be if needed. Three cheers for me!

I Am Authourised

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I am literally standing here holding one of the first copies of the English text book I co-wrote. Except I am sitting. And the book is on a flat surface approximately one and a half metres away from me. The book arrived a couple of days ago and, since then, has not really given me any sense of achievement or enjoyment.

I suppose I have lived with the texts for up to nine months, and had seen the layout in colour photocopy format months before the final edition. I have checked and rechecked the book for possible errors (both grammatical and aesthetical), spending so much time with it that its actual presence on the market (and, I hope, huge presence in classrooms) does not stir my cup of joy.

Saying that, it IS tremendously cool to have had the experience of writing a book and I have just started the first chapter in the next book. I can say now, while I am in the process, that some texts and ideas flow without problem, while others (the World of Warcraft text in the last book springs to mind) cause me untold frustration. So just before I put pen to paper (as I am soon to do when I write a text about kangaroos) I have a feeling of anticipation and excitement, wondering how the ideas I’m forming will come together to be something comprehensible.

Despite our best editing skills, we have (so far) found three mistakes. A pity really, but that cannot be uncommon, knowing now the amount of work that goes into what appears to be a simple school book.

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The Camera Never Lies

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I am not – and Jo will readily testify this – particularly photogenic. As a baby and young boy I had a certain flair, being able to produce a naturally happy face, but in the years of adulthood I am unable to smile for the camera. At best I look contemplative, though mostly I come across as grumpy or bored.

It’s not for the lack of trying that I fail miserably (or succeed to be miserable). Inside my head I believe I’m pulling a cheeky smile; the muscles around my mouth feel like they are tugging excessively. But the end result is nothing more than an expression of mild disdain.

I recently tried forced laughter in one picture, and a positively jaw-breaking open-mouthed smile in another. I looked like a mixture of Elmer Fudd and a Pakistani.

Should my daughters’ memories of me be based on our photos, I fear I may ruin their lives, which is why I write this, in defence.

Oh, Mona Lisa, we are united in a curse.

The First Recognizable Words

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Of course, Zelda has been able to pronounce Mamma and Pappa for a while, now, but her first proper word (which can be a rough pronunciation of the Swedish “lampa”, or the English equivalent) has been “lamp”, along with a raised hand in the air. At first it was no more than an action accompanying the word, but now she is able to point out, or look at, a lamp in the vicinity.

More impressively, she is also able to mimic my farting.

Freya Perling Mario

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This morning Freya asked me to help her lay some perler beads. She wanted to make a Mario, so I printed out one from New Super Mario Bros. I helped her fill in the dungarees and generally worked to her direction, but most of it is her own design.