Category Archives: Game Animal

The Referee’s Still A W*****

Posted on by

Another loss suffered by Stockholm Wolves today, making a 100% failure on my part as a coach to date. I can still console myself with excuses of n00bness, which are nonetheless valid.

I have downloaded a free statistical analysis program that give more figures about my team than an accountant sees in a decade. Hattrick Control has shown me that my first match player positions were completely ridiculous, so, with this newfound information (and let us not forget, information is power), I hope to avoid too many more 5-0 losses this season.

I am, as the hints and tips page of Hattrick suggested, holding back on spending out too much money on players. The last thing I want to do is suffer bankruptcy within a month of receiving my account. I look forward with trepidation to my next (mid-week) match, a friendly against Kristoffer, the sports-teacher at my school that turned me on to the game.

The Referee’s A W****r

Posted on by

The football team that I’ve just started managing played their first match under my command today. We (Stockholm Wolves) were playing at home, in the Trent Park arena, and had an attendance of 1857; that isn’t bad for a newly put-together club, though I suspect many came to support “hästhagen steelers”, our opponents for today.

We lost the game 0-6, a result which does not do justice to our goalkeeper, Stefan Hjalmarsson, and his ability between the posts. The loss was expected, and I shall reserve any judgement about my managing skills until I have got to know the boys.

Hattrick is the place to visit to sign up for your own team, and challange other players (and sometimes bots). It’s visually quite basic, though there appears to be a fair amount of thinking and tactical decisions to be made to make real progress.

Here’s to my first victory, whenever that will come.

How To Ruin A Game

Posted on by

We have finally completed Lord of The Rings: The Third Age, and, for a tenner, it was a good two-player game (of which I am currently an energumen); it was also a fairly lengthy adventure, which gave even more for our money’s worth.

One thing which this game (along with Paper Mario on the Gamecube) sucks at, albeit infrequently, is a few prolix fights, where upon defeating one group of enemies, another battle immediately takes place, and then another, and sometimes a fourth. These series of battles can take twenty minutes or so to complete, and, if one dies, the whole process must be started again. As stated, this happens seldom, and usually only when some really important event is about to take place (the equivalent of boss stages), but a very simple save feature would have been appreciated.

Paper Mario suffers from this disease, though thankfully only when the final boss is met. Whilst we completed The Third Age’s final boss in two attempts, Paper Mario has remained unfinished for well over a year, and will possibly never be finished.

It is a testament to such badly implemented game designs that such flaws can destroy the gaming experience. I can’t remember just how many hours we have been playing Paper Mario (50, maybe), but it leaves a nasty taste in the mouth that so much time spent to complete a game is time wasted. If we do get it together and tackle Paper Mario again, the satisfaction I shall get from completing it will come more from being able to place the game on the “done” shelf, than from knowing we defeated a worthy opponent.

I have nothing against a challenge (thought less so as the years go by, it seems), and perhaps I’m considering myself a better player than I am, but I don’t expect a simple adventure or RPG to be froward. Strategy/God games, however, are a different kettle of lobsters…

How Many People Does It Take To Play A Video Game?

Posted on by

Sometime I wonder why and when I rekindled my fondness for videogames. Now, more than ever, I appreciate playing and reading about all aspects of the culture, and I can only assume it has something to do with revisiting my youth, along with the need to escape (since I don’t go clubbing any more).

There is a rich and varied scene producing some fantastic forms of art, and this Space Invaders performance highlights this perfectly:

The Pole Position re-enactment as actually a better piece, though I have a soft spot for Space Invaders.

Virtual Reality

Posted on by

I was making my way over the playground at work today, after a lunchtime stroll to the shops, when I noticed a crack in the ground. For a split-second I was transported into Jo’s and my current favourite DS title, Animal Crossing, and immediately became excited at the prospect of what kind of fossil may be hiding just below the surface.

I was quickly pulled back into the real world, but found the whole experience (whole being about a tenth of a second) bizarre enough to take a picture. Anyone unfamiliar with Animal Crossing (i.e almost everyone) would find this tale either confusing or worrying, as probably would the majority of Animal Crossing players; I’m slightly proud that my brain works in this way.